Antibiotics and Custard

I detest going to the doctor’s more than anything else. Maybe with the exception of the dentist’s. :p

Every single time, even when all I have is a viral cold, the doctor would prescribe the following:

  1. Panadol (or some cheap version)
  2. Flu tablets (the ones that knock me out immediately after taking it)
  3. Clarinase (if I’m lucky)
  4. Cough syrup (ha! something for my addict friend)
  5. ANTIBIOTICS

I don’t know what it is that these doctors are taught in medical school, aside from playing with corpses’ anuses1, but they seem to be very fond of antibiotics. Oh, you have a cough? Here are some antibiotics. Oh, you have an abscess on your ass? Take some antibiotics. Oh, you cannot get it up? Eat more antibiotics, I’ll colour it blue for you. Every. Fucking. Time. It’s. Them. Antibiotics.

Why? Why? Why? Why?

Antibiotics are not a magical cureall. It’s a drug that kills bacterium and treats infections.

Misuse of antibiotics is a HUGE issue to me. The more you use antibiotics, the more resistant the bacterium will get. Bacterium are living organisms, and they EVOLVE. One example is the Staphylococcus aureus, which is easily treated in the 1950s with penicillin. Due to antibiotic misuse, nearly all strains are now resistant to most types of antibiotics. Once day, antibiotics will be rendered useless.

Use some more, la. I dare you.

My doctor gets a right royal preaching from me everytime I see him, but the twat still insists on prescribing it. I’ll pay for the drug, but I won’t take it, unless I’m at death’s door.

Maybe the problem lies with the fact that most GP’s in Malaysia play all three roles, e.g. that of a physician, a pharmacist and a business person.

Antibiotics got better margin, issit?

After one week, I am still coughing my lungs out. I was awakened this morning by my own coughing… Hack, ack, hack, hack, whack, mack, jack, haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

Ptui! !!!!??!!!

flemmy.jpg

WAH LAU! Damn big man, this piece of phlegm. *blink blink*

As big as a ping-pong ball man… Got bubble somemore. Fuck, it’s disgusting.

Euuuwwwrrrrggghh!

What a way to start the day. 😉

____________________________

1 This is in relation to a popular doctor’s joke about the tutor, his students, a corpse’s anus and the tutor’s third finger.

Advertisements

Chipmunks and Phlegm

Ack, hack, hack! &*%#$@%#

I have been doing a really fantastic impression of a cat choking on its own hairball these few days.

I have tried, hack – excuse me, everything I could think off. Drinking lots of warm water. Took pills like an ecstasy junkie. Gobbled lozenges. I have tried cough mixtures. Popped Fisherman’s Friend and Hacks non-stop into my mouth all day long.

img_4836.jpg

Herbal stuff, my foot!

Fat lot of good all that did me! All I got was an upset and bloated stomach. My mouth feels funny with all the minty stuff that I have been popping in it. I really hope there won’t be any nasty side effects lurking below.

I really, really detest phlegm. I cannot stress that enough. Especially the type that clings tenaciously to your throat. Warm, gooey, icky.

Hack! Hack! Haaaaackkkkk!

Ah…. Satisfaction. I managed to dislodge a HUGE chunk. Since I am out in public, I keep it in my mouth – chipmunk style. We’re not in China, people!

Spit or swallow?

Wait oh wait… The cute hotel receptionist (Grace Park look-alike) is beckoning to me. Girls in uniforms are so HOT.

“Hey, how’s it going?” she inquires.

Guuuuuuuuuuuuuuulp! Oh fuckfuckfuckmuckduck!

The huge chunk of phlegm slides slowly down my throat and slips gratefully back to where it lay snugly before – the little cranny before my windpipe. Tiu.

Apparently, I swallow.

Mac…alister Load!!!

Junction of Macalister Road and New Lane. Here’s where the good stuffs at, some of the locals claim. Not as commercialised as Gurney Drive. Hmm… Let’s go!

macca.jpg

Hawker stalls on both sides of the lane. Wah lau. Motorbikes and car zooming past at 60 – 70 km/h, barely inches from my arse. If anything happens to it, you will suffer a fate worse than my toothpaste, let me warn ya.

macca1.jpg

Food…

macca2.jpgmacca3.jpg

One tasty beef noodle soup: RM4.50
One bowl filled with succulent wanton and suikow: RM5.00
One plate of fragrant fried kuey teow: RM4.00
One glass of refreshing orange juice: RM2.00

One damn kau full bugger.

*buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrpppp* 🙂

Toothpaste

These past two weeks were extremely taxing. I had really tight deadlines to meet, an Adventure Hunt in Langkawi, a convention to attend and a gruelling training workshop in Genting.

In addition to all this, I will be driving to Penang this afternoon for a one week assignment. Alone. The deadlines are tighter than Kylie Minogue’s hot pants. The Penang fieldstaff are as inexperienced as men are at foreplay. Oh and they are also putting me up in a hotel famous for its pay-to-enter-fowls.

Great. My favourite type of assignment. Really.

And, to make things slightly more challenging, my white blood cells chose yesterday, my only day to catch up on much needed rest, to take a tea break and let those damn viruses invade my body.

There’s nothing I hate more than a sore throat and cough, combined.

sick.jpg

Fuckers. Just wait till I catch the culprit. Lazy bugger. I will give him a good whooping.

I feel like shit. Completely drained. Empty.

I gazed mournfully at my empty toothpaste tube. Being the skint that I am, I squeezed it for all it was worth.

Hey hey! There’s still some toothpaste left in the tube…

Stuck

img_4768.jpg

siao yue says:

Yo momma so fat, that when she jumped for joy………………………

She got stuck!

Lesson for today – Darap

darap.JPG 

This is a fruit called darap or tarap. It can be found in East Malaysia, especially popular in Tawau.

It is not a jackoff fruit. It is not a cempedak.

The flesh is juicy and sweet, with a roundish seed around 1cm in diameter. The fruit has a taste that reminds me of ripe mangoes. The outer skin is very soft and yielding.

Most West Malaysians have never seen nor heard of this fruit, and will go WTF is that??!!?

Did I just make you do that?

Depressing

plummet.JPG

Sigh… My readership figures these few days suck big time. It’s going south faster and harder than Paris Hilton did a certain Mr Salomon.

My hands tremble everytime I click on the blog stats button. Trepidation, depression, anxiety is just putting it mildly.

Sigh, I’m an idiot for fretting so much about page hits.

I need to get out more… But but but buttttt…

Outside got no Lilys, Scorkes, Suanies, Fire Angels. Unless I bump into them in public, which WILL HAPPEN when Danny DeVito gets laid in an open park, under a blue moon, with flying piggies flitting about in pink tutus.

Guess I’d stick to sitting indoors hunched over my laptop then.