Poor Elsie

I have a car. Her name is Elsie.

She is a hot chick, thus, inevitably, attracts the wrong sort of attention. Unsavory characters. All the time.

A few months back, some chicken ^@%#$ hit her front and ran away.


Elsie’s front being put back together.

I had a strong sense of foreboding as I left the house this morning. Something is going to happen today. Choy! Taikatlaisee.

Anyway, just as I was reaching my office, I spied a broken lamppost lying across the fast lane.

Out of nowhere, this auntie in a white Proton Wira zoomed past my right. Probably rushing to the morning market – salted vegetables are on sale, apparently.

She must have seen the lamppost too late. Her eyes popped wide open (I think her mouth was open as well), hands turning frantically, foot jammed hard on the brake…


Too late.

C.R.A.S.H!! *&@^#*$&^@^#%&^%@# Klung, klung, klung… Tire rolls off into the distance.

Sigh. I looked up at the sky. Why me?

I managed to get the auntie to drive to my workshop. When we got there, the doors of the Wira opened and out popped four, yes, four middle aged women. Just like jack-in-a-boxes. There seems to be a neverending supply of morning market aunties these days.

One is bad enough. But four? You don’t have to be a genius to predict what happens next.

15 minutes of incessant barraging from these aunties. Attacked from all sides. Shrill voices. Fingers pointing here and there. Spittle flying everywhere. I get confused. Very confused.

I give in. We’ll split the bill 50:50, deal?

I learnt one thing today: Never attempt to out-bargain / reason with morning market aunties, unless you have 40 years’ experience buying fresh vegetables from the market.


Poor Elsie. Poor wallet.


13 Responses

  1. her fault rite? can settle balai rite?

    anttyk: Takes too long for the claims to clear. 😦

  2. Poor Elsie & poor wallet of yours. Was it that major until the lamps were destroyed too? And, why are you offering to pay for? Their fault man. Should just make police report & claim against their insurance policy, so that you don;t lose their NCB. But make sure they don’t claim against your’s pulak then lah. But I know its troublesome, coz kena pergi Traffic Police in PJ (I’m assuming it was in PJ area), then claims takes ages to do since its the other car’s insurnance company.

    anttyk: Troublesome. Takes too much time and effort to get it done the legal way.

  3. Urmm, u mean the 1st pix was for another more serious accident, involving chickens? And it can still fly away? Too bad chickens don’t have 3rd party car insurance policies that you can claim against.

    anttyk: Anonymous chickens are really hard to catch.

  4. poor elsie..got her front and back banged badly!

    anttyk: And the fella didn’t even use protection! Hmph!

  5. kesian u, kena bully by ah soh(s).
    my advise: you should undergo some “scolding” training like Stephen Chow in the movie “gao ban ji ma goon”.
    then u can scold people until go “yu ha hai” flying around. 😛

    anttyk: Haha, I wish. Sadly, I don’t have that skill.

  6. Should have whacked those aunties damn kau kau.
    Oh, you drive a RAV4 eh? Cool.

    anttyk: Cannot. Cannot. 4 against 1, hardly fair, innit?

  7. Poor Koks… Muk sayang back…

    anttyk: He he. Happy now.

  8. i can identify. I’m afraid of my cleaning lady. She breaks everything in my apt too. Sigh. These old ladies, they have more attitude than morisette and crow combined.

    anttyk: The Chinese have this saying: They have consumed more salt than you have rice.

  9. spiller:
    issat that movie, ‘hail the judge’?

  10. Tony, sell Elsie, she attracts too much attention. Get a White Wira like mine.. no one will care… and its cheaper to maintain too..
    i pity Elsie, that day kena kepala, now kena buntut… pity pity.. my wira kena kepala once after 8 years, that also my fault.. 😀

    anttyk: Cannot la. Very sayang to sell. I love Elsie very the much one.

  11. sakitnya!

    anttyk: Ya… We’re both licking our wounds now.

  12. wow…amazing u still alive! did the aunty brought out her samurai to slash u..do not underestimate aunty in 40s might chee york loh’s wife…

    anttyk: ??!?? Chee york loh?

  13. butcher la..

    anttyk: Ooohhh…

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