Six Weird Things About Me

Lily tagged me. So I guess I’d better do something about it, besides going over to her place and bonking her on the head (that sounds a little erm… wierd).

Anyway, here goes.

1. I am afraid of papayas.

Big, small, long, pointed, round – it doesn’t matter what size, shape or colour they come in. I am terrified of them. Oh and I’m talking about the real fruit here not erm, nevermind. I grew up in a plantation, and around my house, we had close to fourteen (14) papaya trees. Those huge, yellowish, bland papayas, which we had for dessert after every single meal (breakfast, lunch, dinner, supper) for eight years.

And you thought you were traumatised.

I guess this explains why I am scared of ‘fooking’ huge papayas as well.

2. I sing weird songs all the time.

All by myself. Random people I meet on the street must think that there’s something seriously wrong with me. Here’s a sample:

Tunku Abdul Rahman,
Curi rambutan,
Bagi saya tengok,
Oh kung ng sap man (fined RM50).

Let’s go to the loo,
We’ve got lots of things to do (ahem),
And the food’s that finger licking good…

Charlie Charlie Chit Pom Pom…

Saya Charlie Chickadee,
Sungguh enak sekali,
Siapa nak lagi,
Saya Charlie Chickadee.

Lei kum kei hou yau (Lee Kum Kee oyster sauce),
Chee pong ka chee.

Note: The actual words should have been ‘chan hai hou mei’ which means really tasty. But as a kid, I misheard the lyrics, and thus I ended up singing it as ‘chee pong ka chee’ all these years. Brilliant.

Tora datang lagi,
Teng teng teng teng teng teng!

There was a man from Nantucket,
Had an ayam jantan so long he could suck it,
He said with a grin,
As he wiped off his chin,
If my ear were a tak boleh I’d fakta it.

3. I can’t stand Horlicks too.

Once, when I was twelve, just before boarding a plane, my mama forced me to drink a cup of that thick yellowish semen-like liquid. Bleargh.

Five minutes later, I was purging and throwing up in the toilet. Both at the same time. Imagine trying to reach the sink while you’re stuck on the toilet seat.

One word. Real mess. Brown, white, gooey, smelly stuff everywhere.

Come to think of it, I can’t bear Complan, Sustagen, Nestum and all other drinks with semen-like consistencies. Yuck.

I wonder how Lils… Nevermind. :p

4. I have a pet cicak in my office cabinet.

He does not have a name. Yet.

5. I have the blackest thumbs in the history of the universe.

Whatever I plant own, dies. I had a potted geranium once. I loved it to bits, and so I watered it every single day. With lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots aaaaaaand lots of water. It drowned and died.

Currently there’s a small cactus plant in my cubicle. I think it’s dead though – as the poor fella’s kinda brownish and well, sad looking.

6. I am obsessed with that crab catching programme on Discovery.

I want to be a crab catcher when I grow up.

I tag Dreymer, Differ, Spiller and Nine Millimetres.

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16 Responses

  1. aku suka hai also..so no.6 is ngam ngam ho, bro

    anttyk: It’s a different sort of crab, bro. When Ronnie Q?

  2. Having cactus as a plant to look after is like asking you to rare guppies (longkang fish) or sea monkeys.

    anttyk: I had some guppies once. They died too, after one week.

  3. how do you know horlicks taste like semen?

    btw..i emailed your gmail. ( to gossip about Nine, Spiller and Sicko)

    anttyk: Oooo… I like gossips. I’m such an ah soh.

  4. the crab catching program on Discovery, The Deadliest Catch? i watch that too. Tell Sean I feel like eating hai in klang. 😀

    anttyk: LOL. I don’t know if she gets it, cos her Cantonese is severely limited. Her Hokkien? Whoah! Wa ka lu kong here. Wa ka lu kong there.

  5. Is Hai as in so hai/ma hai? then I know wot it means 😀

    anttyk: Hai can mean so many things – shoes, sighing, crabs, hello, tak boleh, etc., etc. The list is endless.

  6. hai is crab in cantolah. i can speak some hokkien! sean and i are meant to be together gather, wa ka lu kong!

    anttyk: Lu ka wa kong ha mit? Wa ng chai. Wa si lu lim peh.

  7. klever kop, chow hai is smelly cunt. (errrr this blog rated G ah?)

    anttyk: Not anymore. :p

  8. sicko: yeah..but i said so hai..that’s stupid labia right? I’m not as vile as yew.

    anttyk: It’s pronounced sor hai, Lils.

  9. I think sic may be my soul mate, wa ka lu kong! Klang hai exhausted already, must go elsewhere

    anttyk: OMG.

  10. EEEERRRMMMMM that didn’t come out right at all!!!!!! I meant Klang’s resources!!!! ARRRRR

    anttyk: Too late. Heh.

  11. wei, don’t la gossip abt me.

    anttyk: Why not? Heh.

  12. wei.. apa hai hai crab crab cunt cunt here wei..

    lucky u, lily never email me.. damn, u get to gossip with her some more.. 😦

    anttyk: :o)

  13. anttyk never replied my email 😦

    I think i’ll email spiller next 😀

    anttyk: LOL. I just replied your e-mail!

  14. hehe..i was disappointed for a moment. thot sean wasnt young and nubile anymore.

    anttyk: Sean? Young and nubile? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

  15. hahaah hello crab catcher…. lolllllll

    For your sake i will acquire that programme for malaysian free tv 🙂

    anttyk: Yay! Malaysians can now learn to catch crabs properly. :o)

  16. I remember one Sunday evening badminton with enthusiastic crescendo “Lei kum kei hou yau Chee pong ka chee”.

    The ticking off we got for that was way over the top though.

    anttyk: LOL. I remember that ticking off session too.

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