Bad Fruit

It’s Christmas morning, and I find myself on my hands and knees. My entire kitchen floor is covered with a smelly and sticky liquid. I start checking the entire area, looking for the source. I crawl slowly getting sticker and sticker by the minute when I notice a trickle of the liquid running down the kitchen cabinet.

My eyes follow the sluggish brown line up and across the kitchen counter, finally resting on an innocent looking watermelon. I placed it on the counter top barely a week ago.

“Who? Me?” the watermelon protests it’s innocence, albeit a little unconvincingly.

I gently lift the fruit and a gush of the sticky brown juices greets me. *splaaaaaaaaaassssshhhhhhhhhh*

Coughcoughcoughspluttersplutter.

The watermelon is bad, and there’s a huge hole in the bottom. My kitchen walls, cabinets and floor is covered with the liquid. I take four hours to clean up the entire place. Even today, two weeks later, my house smells funky.

I shower and collapse in front of the television. As evening approaches, Seekarlui shows up with a Christmas present for me.

It is a bottle of perfume.

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16 Responses

  1. no fridge ah?

  2. des,

    No room in the fridge. Had another watermelon in it.

  3. Why so many watermelons?

  4. i don’t like watermelon. got too many seeds!

    bravo Seekarlui for rescuing anttyk yet again 😉

  5. wat ru doing with 2 watermelons?!? you starting fruit business? 🙂

  6. Muks,

    Two is not a lot. It’s a pair. Good things come in pairs! :p

    yati,

    Err… What about seedless watermelons? Aha, yes… Seekarlui to the rescue!

    atai,

    Wanted to sell them to my neighbours. No one was interested though. Probably because the watermelons had holes in them and were filled with vodka. 😉

    Hehheh.

  7. don’t tell me those watermelons were the ones i saw on your countertop when you had your housewarming??!!!?? no wonder they’d gone bad! Jeez! It’s been like 3 wks since then!!! Eeeeuwwww!!!

    Seekarlui, was that a sarcastic jibe or plain concern? hehehe…

  8. wtf got so many watermelons? lol

  9. walauweh.. at least should have cut up the watermelon and make juice la..

  10. blusher,

    Those are the ones. Yep! :o)

    KY,

    OO <– One pair. Nice. Not a lot.

    desparil,

    Hahaha. Was too lazy to do it. My butler seems to have gone missing. Hmm…

  11. You think breasts are gross but you keep two watermelons for fun? Are you in denial?

  12. Lils,

    Haha… I think BIG breasts are gross… Come to think of it, my watermelons were quite big. Hmmm… Okay, I have a problem. Helpch me!

    :o)

  13. you mean the watermelon from the housewarming??? blame dan, his bloody request..make him eat it no matter what!

  14. Sean,

    It’s my own fault. I forgot about the watermelon… 😦

  15. u sure the smell wasn’t coming from u? heh.

    oooh… toons are facing manure this wknd without a manager, a dodgy defence and misfiring forwards.

    sheesh.. talk abt going into a boxing match with one arm tied behind ur back.

  16. 9,

    Thank you for the support. Pffbbbrrtt! :p

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