What do you get when you cross a pig and a millipede?

Bacon and legs.



What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?



Two goldfish were in their tank. One turns to the other and says, ‘You man the guns, I’ll drive.’


How would you describe an accident where a truck loaded with turtles had been overturned?

A turtle disaster.

Pink Beef

Seekarlui told me this one and it made me laugh. You have to read it out loud, though…

What did the Pink Panther say when he accidentally stepped on an ant?

*Pink Panther tune* Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant dead ant dead ant dead ant, dead annnnttttt…

= = =

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.

Lightbulbs and Mice

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two, if they are small enough.


Did you hear about the shoe factory that burnt down?

Two hundred soles were lost.